How to Pick the Right Girl for a Cold Approach

You walk into a crowded coffee shop and eye the girls inside, deciding who would make the best target for a little chit-chat.

If you knew their stories, this is what you would find out:

You see Laura, a beautiful blonde.  Unbeknownst to you, she is exhausted from last night’s activities, and now she is cramming for a big test that she has to take in a few hours.  She hooked up with her steady hook up buddy last night.  She has a solid network of friends in the area.

Alexa sips her coffee, her eyes wandering occasionally.  Alexa has just moved to Chicago from San Diego a few days ago. She is working as a server and looking to meet some new people. One of the reasons she came to Chicago was to get away from the stench of a bad breakup.

Natasha, an attractive Latina, is meeting her boyfriend in 10 minutes.  They have been together for 6 years and engaged for 1.  They have traveled together for 6 months in Europe, and done several thanksgivings together.  Natasha is just barely pregnant with her boyfriend’s baby.

Adriana, an average looking to pretty girl, just found out her boyfriend was cheating on her a few months ago.  She has recovered from the breakup, and now she is single for the first time in years.   Though pretty, she has forgotten what the dating scene is like and is a very shy girl.  In her head she wishes someone would make the first move on her—she is really nervous about having sex for the first time in years with a guy other than her ex-boyfriend.

Who do you hit and what do you say?

4 responses to “How to Pick the Right Girl for a Cold Approach

  1. Laura is cramming, which says a lot about how she looks at responsibility. She’s also hooking up with a guy she’s not in a relationship with. Carousel riders are right out. For a guy who is only after sex, she might be right, but not for me.

    Alexa thinks a change in location will solve her problems. It won’t. Fail.

    Natasha is in a LTR and is pregnant with another man’s child. I wouldn’t mess with the LTR, but to interfere with a child involved too … nope.

    Adriana on the other hand is shy and looking for a man to make the first move. That makes her the best prospect in my book.

    I’d lead off with … “Hi!”

  2. Depending on where in the shop Adriana is to me I may make strong eye contact or pretend I don’t notice her. If she’s close to where I am or where I’m going I’d open her…
    But let’s say she’s on the other side of the room with a great view of me. (I’m going to say this because she’s “shy”. Introverts usually position themselves away from crowds and walking lanes.)
    I’d hit up Natasha and get her to laugh. I wouldn’t make a scene or hit on her. My reasoning is her mood. She’s about to meet her boyfriend, and seems like the most open to conversation out of the girls listed. Hopefully Adriana sees my interaction and let’s me in closer for it. I’d cut Natasha short and glance around the room as I picked a seat. Depending on her body language I would use a direct or in-direct approach.
    Make an observation about her and tease. “You look so lonely. I’ll sit with you, but you’re going to owe me.” And that may even be too strong. I’d probably hold the negs and try to lower my status to just above hers until she warms up.

  3. I really don’t know why I chose Alexa but she seems to be the ideal type when it comes to ones I meet in a cafe setting.

    IDK, I guess because she seems to be the easier target with least baggage. Then again, I don’t like easy targets.

  4. Alexa–least amount of work and lowest risk. Adriana is gonna have lots of inhibitions. You’ll probably crash and burn with Adriana unless you are very experienced and even then she might stalk you after pair-bonding with you after only a ONS. There’s really no question about the target.

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